Compulsive lying, or mythomania, can be common in people with Borderline Personality Disorder.
I believe there are several basic motivations to lie when you have BPD. There are also two types of lies: by admission (by telling) and by omission (by not telling). Both types are a problem with someone with BPD. The motivations for telling a lie (or omitting truth) by someone with BPD are as follows:
1. When it is more painful to admit or tell the truth.
2. When she wants the other person to think “better” of her than she thinks of herself.
3. To avoid the judgment of the other person or judgment of herself.
4. When she can’t see the “truth” because of emotional reasoning brought on by the refractory period of the emotion felt. In other words, when feelings = facts.
(From anythingtostopthe pain)
Here is a simple list of common signs.
- Intense Anger and Aggressive Behavior: Some people with BPD experience intense anger that they rarely or never express outwardly. Others express anger openly, sometimes in the form of physical aggression. Angry behavior, ranging from sarcastic comments to physical violence against other people, is one common sign of BPD.
- Abandonment Sensitivity: People with BPD tend to have difficulties in their relationships. In particular, people with BPD can be very sensitive to abandonment. They may believe they are being left by someone when that is not actually the case. They may also engage in behaviors meant to provide reassurance that the other person still cares about them. For example, they may call someone on the telephone repeatedly asking for confirmation that the relationship is still intact.
- Unstable and Intense Relationships: BPD is associated with patterns of very unstable and intense interpersonal relationships. These relationships can be characterized by alternating between idealization and devaluation. The relationship may start in the idealization phase with the person with BPD feeling intensely connected to and positive about the other person and wanting to spend a lot of time with this person. When the devaluation phase emerges, the person with BPD may see the other person as worthless, mean or uncaring, and may attempt to distance herself from them.
- Unstable Self-image or Sense of Self: The same instability in relationships can also apply to self-image or sense of self. A person with BPD may seem to believe that they are successful one moment, but the next may be extremely self-denigrating or hard on themselves. Their sense of self may also be unstable, which may lead them to behave differently in different contexts, such behaving one way around one group of friends but another way entirely around another group.
- Engaging in Risky Impulsive Behaviors: Many people with BPD exhibit risky impulsive behaviors, such as shopliftings, abusing drugs or alcohol, promiscuity or driving recklessly.
- Emotional Ups and Downs: Although this is not always something that can be observed from the outside, people with BPD tend to have intense and frequent mood changes that usually occur in response to something happening in the environment. They may go from seeming content to feeling upset in a matter of moments.
Sound familiar? In your current sexual assault case?
They engage in behavior referred to by therapists as splitting: Everyone else is treated either like a god or a complete pile of manure, with nothing in between. Interestingly, patients with BPD are often described by therapists as being superb manipulators.
(From Psychology Today)
Many things can destroy trust and intimacy between partners when one is a high conflict person, often someone with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder. But one of the top ones is lying–especially when it is about extramarital contact. A disclaimer: not all people with BPD or knowingly NPD lie. It’s just that those who do lie so thoroughly and often that they spoil it for those who do not.
(From BPDcentral) This is particularly interesting with a discussion of the types of lies a BPD engages in, and possibly why.